Auto-LGTM Glasses

Product Description

The Auto-LGTM Glasses by ReviewSkip use cutting-edge RetinalApproval™ technology to automatically approve any pull request you glance at. Finally, code review at the speed of eye movement! Core Features: • Gaze Detection: Looks good to eye = looks good to me • Instant PR approval upon visual contact • Automatic "LGTM 🚢" comment generation • Blink twice to add "minor nits addressed offline" • Wink to request changes (but why would you?) Advanced Review Modes: • Speedrun Mode: Approves before you even look • Rubber Stamp Mode: "Approved pending CI" (CI will probably pass) • Manager Mode: Approves everything with "great work team!" • Senior Dev Mode: Adds random architectural concerns in comments while still approving • Burnout Mode: "whatever" with approval Smart Comment Generator: • "Looks good, just a few minor suggestions" • "Nice work! One tiny thing though..." • "LGTM but consider refactoring this later" • "Approved but let's discuss the approach" • "Ship it 🚀" • "😂" (to that one funny variable name) Technical Specs: • Review Speed: 10-100x faster than reading code • Accuracy: Who cares? It's shipped! • False Negative Rate: 0% (everything is approved) • False Positive Rate: 100% (technically everything is false) Productivity Metrics: • Average PRs reviewed per day: 147 • Average time per review: 0.8 seconds • Code actually read: 2% • Production bugs introduced: Yes ⚠️ Disclaimer: ReviewSkip is not responsible for: • Production outages • Angry teammates • "How did this get merged?!" Slack messages • Your unemployment • The inevitable rewrite Perfect for hitting those code review KPIs! Remember: The best PR is a merged PR.